Athena CEO Gina Cotner was recently interviewed by Davina Frederick of Wealthy Woman Lawyer. The conversation moved into a discussion around delegating thinking:
I thought to myself, “Well, let’s just go there and see if I can start to speak somewhat intelligently about this.” Again, this is where I think the real freedom lies.
Yes – graduate level delegation is delegating thinking. Consider saying to your assistant (or someone who reports to you) something like:
“Go think about this please.”
“Go research this and tell me what you think and what questions you have.”
“What questions should I have?”
The other graduate level delegation skill is to delegate an entire process or project, knowing that your assistant or whomever is working for you, doesn’t know much about the topic. And perhaps neither do you! Rather than you doing the initial research to figure something out and then delegating smaller pieces and parts of the next steps, you give the entire project to someone. After explaining what youthink you want and what you are after, you can then say, “This project is yours. I know you’ve never done this before, and neither have I. No problem. You please dive in. Lead the charge. Do some initial research. Let me know what you learn, what you think, what you see next steps might be and then let’s talk.”
After this, the project is theirs. It belongs to them. Now you work for them. Now you work for your assistant. Your job is now to be a useful, valuable, responsive team player.
Once they have done this initial research or an even deeper dive, you can start providing answers or asking more detailed and educated questions to partner in getting what you want done, DONE. This kind of partnership with your EA is an invaluable tool that will pay off huge once you get into a rythym!
When you delegate more than you think someone can handle, or more than you think they are equipped to do, you will find out what they really are capable of! They may not be able to do 100% of what you have asked, but you may find that they can accomplish 90% and previously you would have bet they could only do 70%, but you got surprised while discovering that they are more capable than you thought.
“Cute bitchy, but not “bitchy” bitchy.” – The Diplomat. S1 Ep 3.
There I was one evening where I often can be found, on the couch sitting next to my honey after he has cooked a great meal and I have thoroughly cleaned the kitchen. It was around 8pm when we usually figured out which of “our shows” to watch. That of course was followed by at least five minutes of trying to remember which streaming service it’s on. “Honey, it’s on Netflix, or maybe Prime.” “No, I think it’s on Hulu or Apple.” Uggh.
Soon our minds left the hot topics of the business day and matters around the house, and we were transported to the UK, rooting for Kate Wyler, (played by Keri Russell) the new U.S. ambassador to the United Kingdom in the Netflix show, The Diplomat. It was only episode three and I was all in. Exactly like I was with Madame Secretary, another strong, smart female lead political show.
34 minutes in, our heroine, Kate is in conversation with the White House Chief of Staff and the person who is the right-hand to our U.S. ambassador in London. They are trying to convince Kate that she would make a compelling Vice President.
Then I hear this dialog in the show and say to John, “Wait. Pause it! Back it up. I have to hear that again.” And I listen again:
I mean, it’s bad for the guys, but for the women? F-me. Is she pretty, but not too pretty? Appealing but not hot? Confident but not bitchy? Decisive but not bitchy? Cute bitchy, but not bitchybitchy?
We had to come to an agreement about how many days a week the VP would wear a thong. She doesn’t like them. Her team doesn’t like panty lines. Weeks of my life were spent on this. And then an agreement. Yes, she will wear ass floss but only two days out of seven, and days cannot be banked week to week.
Can you imagine hiring someone for a key governing position just because you think they would be good at it?
I jumped off the couch saying, “Wow! Yes. Yep. Oh my god. That’s it, right there!”
And that is it. That’s the world I have lived in for a long time. I had never heard it put to language so well. So clear. So spot-on. The best and worst part is that I’m really good at living in this world. I’ve been honing it and mastering it since I was a teenager. I never considered there was any other way. But then I heard it put into words and I see it written on this page and I think to myself, “Something about this is so sad.”
I’ll stop this chapter here. I’ll let you sit with that. I’ve returned to this piece many times, considering where I want to go next with it. There are too many options, so there are likely more chapters to come.
Ever since watching that scene on TV, I’ve been thinking on this, and many small snippets of my past have popped up. Snippets that helped shape me as a professional, successful woman business owner today, and will lead to the next chapters to share with you:
How my mom was as a professional woman I watched as I grew up. I watched her get ready and go to work every day and climb the ladder.
What my dad had to say about “looks” and how someone should “look”.
My experiences of belonging or not belonging in the crucial teenage years and how I mitigated that.
The experience in my 20’s when I realized that one’s “looks” could be used to make a difference. That extra minute or two you are given could be used for good.
The brain science around who and what we find visually appealing.
A very short, very memorable conversation with a beautiful mother, raising a stunningly beautiful daughter who was a model, and what she had to say about raising her.
Meanwhile, enjoy this article that was also part of the inspiration for me to begin to write about this.
Side note: Around the time I finished writing this, the ‘Barbie’ movie came out. Some of you may enjoy reading America Ferrera’s monologue that came right before the final scene. (Spoiler alert.)
Meet Rachel Brown – one of our incredibly talented Virtual Executive Assistants. ⭐️
Rachel loves the work-life balance she helps her clients achieve, while also maintaining a healthy balance for herself and her family. Consistency and quality communication are the key!
Athena EA Hope Beach shares what she loves about working with Athena and describes the ‘culture of yes’ that is at the forefront of everything we do. AND… Congratulations to Hope who walked the stage last weekend for completing her Master’s Degree!
How do Athena EAs manage confidentiality, discretion, and security? Our Executive Assistants operate with the highest level of integrity required – which is all-important when you have people’s personal lives and personal data in your hands.
Please know that our values are not kept in a binder or on a shelf collecting dust. They are not framed on wall soon to become as impactful as wallpaper! Our values are talked about and discussed regularly. They are a compass for everyone’s development here at Athena.
Athena virtual assistants make it possible for our clients not only to get more done but to be more fulfilled and satisfied with the work that they do themselves. We take off your plate, those items that are not worthy of your time, skill, purpose and prowess.
